Sleep tight my Angel

Madi Moo oh how we love you.
12/5/12-12/15/12
10 amazing and beautiful days. Without a doubt God sent us a miracle and she brought hope&faith to so many.
12/15/12- The day went like normal. Phillip & I were beyond tired so we went downstairs to the sleeping rooms they provide for the families. We slept till about 5am bc my mothers internal alarm woke me up. We walked to get ourselves a quick drink and then went upstairs to see how our angel was progressing. She was having some difficulty with her feeding tube and we wanted to make sure things were okay this go around. My parents were asleep and our night shift nurse informed us that she had rejected one dose, but digested the other two. (Great news) she had finally pooped (been almost 3 days) and we knew she was happy to have her bully full. All we wanted was to make sure she would be comfortable and happy. Phillip & I took turns holding her and then it came time for her next feeding (shift change so we had a new nurse & new set of doctors) We both agreed it was way past time for a shower so we headed back down to freshen up and get our parents up (who had relocated to the room to catch some sleep) All of us got ready for the day and headed to grab a quick bite to eat. It was close to 10:00 when we returned to the room.
Madilynn was rejecting the formula again, so we figured it was the formula and I would give her breast milk. It had been awhile since I had pumped anything so it took a little bit longer to get it out but I managed to get her 40ccs ready for her feeding time. We called in the nurse and started to get ready to give her the milk . My parents came in and it began...
It started off with her grunting at us, and then I swear she looked at all of our faces. It was a look we had never seen before, like she was getting a final image of us. I was holding her up because she just threw up a little formula and that's when her small spells she has started. I picked her up and put her close to my heart. We watched the monitor thinking it was just going to be like any other time....her doing it and then coming right back. It wasn't. I knew in my heart this was it. She had a faint heartbeat so I told them to detach all the cords that monitor her and take out the feeding tube. They quickly removed everything and I put her back on my chest while Phillip stood next to me holding her as well. She took one last deep long breath and that was it. She was home.
I cried and cried for my baby. My heart was broken (is broken) but I am so very grateful we were with her holding her as she left us. I know she waited for all of us to be in there before she left. She is so precious and she loved us so very much. She was here on borrowed time and touched so many lives before going back to God. He sent her down with a mission in mind and I honestly believe that she completed that from all the people she touched and the faith she restored to so many. Never would I be angry for that. I'm beyond happy that not only did she touch our families lives but she touched so many strangers lives who grew to love her from pictures and simple status updates.
All the prayer and love she got kept her going, kept her fighting a little bit longer but today she knew it was time to leave this world and be back with our All mighty God. She is whole, not feeling pain, not suffering or anything like that. She is free to spread her wings.
I love you so much my precious Madi moo and it is so very hard without you here. The days will be tough but I know you are always watching over me till I can see that sweet face again. Forever you will be in my heart till the day your in my arms again. Thank you for fighting so hard for us princess. You are such a strong and brave little Angel and I am so very proud God picked me to be apart of your wonderful story. I would do it all over again because it was so so worth having you in my arms for these 10 amazing days. You have been such a blessing to us and I love you to the moon and back. All I wanted was to make sure you knew how much you were loved and I know in my heart you did.
Thank you Lord for allowing us so much time with her. We never expected to be so blessed.
Madilynn Anahera Brown
Arrived 12/5/12 @9:19 am and left us 12/15/12 @11:51 am
Thank you princess for sharing your time with us. We love you so very much.